


i wish

by scripturientt



Category: Amuse Inc., YG Entertainment | YG Family
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Break Up, Breaking Up & Making Up, Getting Back Together, M/M, Regret, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-06-10
Packaged: 2020-04-05 03:33:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19040302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scripturientt/pseuds/scripturientt
Summary: where noa and raesung are ex-lovers and one of them has regrets.𝘪 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘪 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪 𝘥𝘪𝘥..𝘪 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘥 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪'𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘪 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by taylor swift - i wish you would
> 
> [ lowercase ]

**[ 0 1 ]**

_you think i hate you now 'cause you still don't know what i never said..._

 

it was a rainy night.

 

raesung thought that the atmosphere around him was melancholic, for he was reminiscing something... they weren't sad memories, but he wasn't feeling happy in remembering them. being reminded of the past was a tad bittersweet and really frustrating for him, which was why his aura turned gloomier.

 

"how are you holding up there?" hyunsuk asked, looking at him through the mirror of the car.

 

he was with hyunsuk and byounggon (who was driving) and as the only one in the backseat, it was only natural that they'd check up on him since he wasn't usually that quiet.

 

"fine." he answered blandly as he looked at the window again.

 

rain poured outside, making a pitter-patter sound that was both relaxing and nostalgic as he yet again remembered his midnight drives on rainy nights with a certain someone.

 

he sighed and continued staring at the window, focusing on the droplets of water that were continuing to fall and slide down the glass window, street and citylights reflecting on it, making its own sort of aesthetic.

 

"that sigh doesn't make your answer convincing you know." hyunsuk remarked from the front seat.

 

raesung ignored him and pulled out his phone. he opened twitter and his brain froze as he read the very first two tweets on his timeline.

 

'remembering someone special at a rainy 2am'

'i wish you didn't hate me'

 

fuck.

 

what the fuck.

 

his mind reeled as he clicked on the tweet.

 

'failed to load tweet' it said at the bottom.

 

he must've deleted it then...

 

noa, his ex whom he still has lingering feelings for, was most likely subtweeting about him... and thinks that raesung hates him.

 

it was laughable, how raesung immediately got giddy at the thought that maybe, just maybe, there's a chance that noa still has feelings for him too.

 

and it wasn't really surprising that noa thought raesung hates him. their break-up was more like raesung cursing him out over the phone at 2am and hanging up before noa could say anything.

 

raesung would be lying if he said that he didn't regret doing it, but he'd rather die than admit that and his pride stopped him from talking to noa again.

 

it's been 6 months... half a year without him and raesung wasn't as well-adjusted as he was acting.

 

"we're here." byounggon said softly as they stopped over.

 

raesung was pulled out of his musings and he got out of the car, went in the dorm and straight to his room.

 

"he's still hung up about noa, isn't he?" hyunsuk sighed as he entered the dorm with byounggon beside him. 

 

"yeah." he answered. "let's sleep now too. we have classes at 9am right?"

 

hyunsuk smiled. "alright. goodnight, hyung."

 

"goodnight suk."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i could barely write a chapter someone save me

**[ 0 2 ]**

_it's 2am in my room_

_headlights pass the window pane, i think of you_

 

raesung couldn't sleep... he was still wrapping his head around the fact that noa might still be thinking of him too.

 

for the past months, he'd been wallowing in regret because damn, how did he even think that he could live his life happily without noa?

 

content, maybe. but not happy... never happy.

 

he didn't think that anyone else can make him smile and laugh freely like the japanese boy used to, nor did he think that anyone else could make his heart pound just by the sight of them.

 

raesung tossed and turned around his bed but no matter how much he did, sleep still wouldn't come to him.

 

he buried his head on his pillow and groaned, feeling so frustrated. it wouldn't do him any good if he ended up with no sleep. he had classes in the morning. well, unless he decided to ditch.

 

rain poured outside, the skies rumbling as it thundered loudly, making raesung more wide awake than before.

 

he rolled off the bed and stood up, starting to pace around because even a small ounce of sleepiness just wouldn't come.

 

headlights reflected on his window. the red and orange lights and the water droplets making him nostalgic yet again...

 

why did they decide to do 2am drives when it's rainy, again?

 

oh. because both of them really couldn't sleep.

 

raesung sighed again and returned to his bed for another attempt at sleep.

 

he'd succeed this time around, hopefully.

* * *

_we're a crooked love, in a straight line down..._

_makes you wanna run and hide then it makes you turn right back around..._

 

the first thing that entered raesung's mind as he blearily opened his eyes the next morning was 'fuck, my head hurts'

 

he grabbed his phone from his bedside table and opened it. with his eyes squinting, he tried to decipher the time as his eyes still wasn't used to the light.

 

9:45

 

well damn. he had just missed one class...

 

and goddamn, he thought... as he realized that the only person he knew in that class was noa.

 

'fuck... i'm so screwed now.' he groaned and got up to prepare. his next class was at 11:00, and he somewhat had to gather up his courage to talk to noa about the class he missed.

 

'a long day ahead, huh...'

 

raesung arrived at the school at 10:30, with some minutes to spare if he ever decided to talk to noa. (if he does see him though)

 

he was reluctant to do so, because he felt like he shouldn't start his reconciliation with him like that. he felt like he had to apologize, to at least tell noa that he didn't mean half of what he saif but no. he was too prideful to do that. hell, raesung was even having second thoughts about approaching noa about their class.

 

still, classes were one of his priorities and he had to swallow his pride for this, unfortunately.

 

he was just walking along one of the corridors when he caught a sight of a tall brunette which was undoubtedly noa. he was with junkyu and seunghun, who parted ways with him and the japanese boy was now alone.

 

raesung was about to approach noa when the other boy suddenly turned to the lockers that were positioned on the side of the corridor.

 

he frowned as noa took a bunch of papers and folded it, slipping it into one of the lockers that raesung recognized as his own.

 

'what?' he thought in confusion and looked at the japanese boy, who was now walking away nonchalantly as if he didn't do anything.

 

raesung waited until noa took a turn and disappeared before he walked up to his locker and checked it.

 

he froze as he opened the pieces of paper that noa slipped in... they were notes.

 

notes from the class he missed earlier.

 

somehow, noa noticed that he wasn't there and took down notes for him. he also knew that raesung was too prideful and might not approach him so he just slipped it into his locker instead.

 

he also noticed that noa didn't give any indication that he was the one who did it, meaning that he wasn't using it as an opportunity to talk to him again. he just did it because he wanted to help.

 

guilt rushed through raesung's veins as he recalled how thoughtful and nice noa was and he just threw everything back at his face.

 

he probably didn't deserve to talk to him again.

 

sighing, he clutched the notes noa made for him and walked towards the classroom of his next class.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pulled this outta my ass at like 10:20pm because i am stressed and i had to do smth to distract myself

**[ 0 3 ]**

_2 am, here we are..._

_see your face, hear my voice in the dark..._

 

it didn't rain.

 

raesung couldn't hear thunder, or the pitter-patter sound that made him stay up and watch the water pour down and drench everything outside but he still laid wide awake.

 

it was a quarter to 2am and he was growing restless. sleep still wasn't coming to him like usual and he was fortunate enough to not have classes the next day.

 

which was why instead of attempting to sleep, he rolled off his bed and changed out of his sleep wear to one of his more casual ones, the ones he wears at home and sneaked out off their dorm.

 

there was a convenience store about 2 blocks away and raesung headed for it, not knowing where else to wander off to.

 

he supposed that he could buy a few snacks since he really had trouble sleeping.

 

raesung grabbed a few items and paid for it, heading towards the door and planning to go back to his dorm.

 

as he was went out of the store though, he saw a figure leaning against the wall a few feet away. 

 

raesung couldn't really see his face clearly because it was dark, but he could make out half of it and by the silhouette, he could recognize it as noa.

 

in a moment of impulsiveness, he pulled out his phone and sent noa a message.

 

noa's phone buzzed and raesung saw him look at it. the japanese boy froze.

 

_' sounds cliché but i still love you. i didn't mean what i said '_

 

"noa" raesung called out softly, and said boy proceeded to turn his head towards him, eyes wide and a look of disbelief etched on his face.

 

"rae.... you-"

 

"i'm sorry" raesung said, approaching noa and stopped in front of him.

 

noa gave him a small hesitant smile. "is this real or am i high?"

 

"it's real, you fucking dork" raesung told him with a breathy laugh, even though he himself hasn't wrapped his head around the fact that they were confronting each other right now.

 

"so..." he trailed off awkwardly. "take me back?" he half-jokingly asked.

 

noa's smile widened. "you didn't even need to ask." 

 

he pulled raesung closer, invading his personal space and held him between his arms once again after six months.

 

as their foreheads bumped, raesung got impatient and pressed his lips against noa's briefly.

 

"missed me?" he asked cheekily.

 

"no fucking duh." noa replied, rolling his eyes.

 

raesung grinned, feeling a lot better than he did for the last half of the year.

 

"i'm really happy, noa."

 

"me too, rae. me too."

 

_we're a crooked love in straight line down..._

_guess you wanna run and hide but it made us turn right back around._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk if the ending was satisfying but meh.


End file.
